Some spectacularly potty Potter predictions

Who's the Half-Blood?

In the spirit of the release of ze very eagerly awaited Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince, I've decided to make some uneducated and half-witted guesses as the nature of its contents

SPOILER ALERT: If you haven't read any of the Potters you should know that the following half-truths may reveal crucial plot details of more than one book. You should also seriously consider jumping off a cliff.

Here goes...

Numero 1: I'm pretty sure of this one: In true LOTR spirit, Sirius (the) Black returns as Sirius (the) White to complete his journey in this world.

Numero 2: Who snuffs it in this book? Ans: Albus Dumbledore. But why, you ask? The cover (pictured above) shows Dumbledore instructing Harry on something. My guess: He's the new Defence Against the Dark Arts teacher. And we all know what happens to them!! (But don't worry, he'll then return to guide Harry in spirit, a la Scooby Dooby Obi-Wan Kenobi)

Numero 3: Ron and Hermoine get seriously snuggly in this one!

Numero 4: Who's the titular half-blood prince? Difficult, very difficult. Let's work this out. Half-blood "Prince" suggests that there must a half-blood "King". And do we know any half-blood who happens to be a King? Or a Lord? Could that be Lord Voldemort? Why, yes! And that would make the half-blood prince his illegitimate son/grandson, probably conceived after a long night of Dark magic and Butterbeers!

Numero 5: What is the big secret that is going to be revealed about Lily Potter, Harry's mother? My guess is it'll be something to show that Harry is related in a more intricate way to the Dark Lord than we've been led to believe. The revelation will also involve Aunt Petunia in some way and will tie into all the above numeros (except, possibly, numeros 1, 2 and 3)

Over and out.